Okay, so I apologize tremendously for what you're seeing right now. This is hard even for me to look at, and I basically have to see this every day. It's a self-portrait I did for my Life Drawing class and I decided to go the more unconventional route by drawing a close-up of my mouth.

But you know, there was an actual motive behind this; I wasn't really just intending to gross everyone out. You see, I have these kind of...weird psychological issues about my teeth. And dentists. And it seems like I always feel really self-conscious whenever my teeth are in any way visible to others--an apprehension which I partially attribute to dentists for having dutifully fulfilled their heinous job of instilling me with a deep-seated sense of shame and anxiety about my teeth. I know their fiendish pretense is to "help" people with their oral hygiene, but deep down they have cold, black souls intent on wreaking as much human anguish and suffering as possible. Don't kid yourselves, it's a universal truth.

Anyway, the weird thing is that I also have this strange sensitivity about my teeth, despite the fact that I know they look disgusting...I mean, why else would I have drawn them like this? So basically, this self-portrait is a warning to myself to take better care of my teeth. I'm supposed to look at it and be reminded of just how much more revolting my teeth will become unless I decide to change some of my unfavorable habits. The ironic thing is that I HATE dentists more than words can describe, yet this drawing (and the meaning behind it) makes it the ideal kind of image to be displayed in a dental clinic. The very thought is abominable to me. >_<

But uh...in fairness to my teeth, I did actually exaggerate their repulsiveness a bit. I intensified a lot of the colors (especially the yellows), and I explicitly colored the inner portion of my mouth to really make the viewer focus on the hideousness therein. The size of this drawing was 22x30," and I had to use my crappy camera to take this super crappy photo, as you might've guessed.

And btw, I just have to say, I really hate the way I'm smiling here. Lol, I look so retarded. But I think I intentionally used this expression because I knew it would really help drive the point home for me. I mean, if I see myself smiling like that, with those monstrous teeth, then there's no doubt it's going to scare me straight and keep me away from the sugary drinks and whatnot. XD; Now that I think about it, this should really be the first of, like, a series of drawings that progressively get worse, where each picture shows my teeth decaying more, getting more and more crooked, more decalcified, more discolored...and in general just more grotesque. Even though I'd seriously hate myself for negotiating with gum-gouging demon spawns from hell, I might actually be able to sell that kind of stuff to a few dentists for their own sick, twisted use.

Hopefully I'd have the moral fiber and general human decency to resist such decadent temptations, though.

Okay, the agonizing description is coming to an end, I promise. I deeply apologize yet again for exposing you all to the ungodly horror of my mouth. And even though this was supposed to be a cautionary/motivational picture for myself, it might have a surprisingly beneficial influence on you all, as well. Just think to yourselves how much you do not want to have teeth like mine, and then maybe your own oral hygiene--which I have no doubt is vastly superior to mine anyway--will show marked improvement. (:

Made mostly with graphite; the inside of my mouth was actually colored with Prismacolor and Copic markers (on paper very ill-suited for markers, might I add. If I weren't so God-awful with colored pencils, I totally would've used them instead).

Done, finally! I'll be amazed if anyone actually read all of that.